Not Exactly Something One Man Does to Another Man
by Zurui Karasu
Summary: A very random, very stupid, very short Gaav and Valgaav one shot! Why is Gaav resisting the advances of his oh so sexy cohort? Simple, it's just not something one man does to another man! Right?


Author's Note: Now this is just scary!  ^^;;  Something my twisted little mind came up with very fast, and wrote equally fast!  I just thought it was silly.  XD  yes, all Val really wants is to offer his beloved Gaav-sama pleasure doesn't he?  And I use just plain Val because it's awkward to use Valgaav and Gaav in the same fic, that's all!  Enjoy!  And please don't hurt me!!  *Waves banners that read 'Gaav + Val = Love 4 EVAH!' *

Not Exactly Something One Man Does to Another Man

The wily expression plastered across the horned Mazoku's broadly grinning face was more than unsettling to the flame-haired brazen Dark Lord as he inched a few steps away from his teal, spiky-haired servant kneeling with hands clasped together expectantly, a devious glint shining through his clear amber eyes.  The young Halfling had practically broken down his bedroom door to come in under the pretext of asking him a question, but when he had stalked in, hair wet and gleaming, wearing only baggy cream colored pants and a few bands around his wrist, the Demon Dragon King had known instantly he was in grave danger.

"For the absolute last time Val, no!" Gaav barked, cheeks flushing a slight pink, "There's no way in the four worlds I'm letting you do that to me!"

Val inched forward as Gaav retreated, nearly fleeing for his life, pleading wounded animal look growing even stronger in magnitude as the grin spread and desire blazed undaunted deep within his chest.

"Please Gaav-sama!  All I want is to pleasure you!  I want to so badly!  I can't help it!" he moaned, clawing desperately at the sash tied extra-tightly around his master's waist, who gasped in terror and shoved him back to the floor.

"Absolutely not!" he protested adamantly as his servant reeled, "You can too help it, because I am your master and I'm telling you to!"

"Oh come on Gaav-sama, please?  I know you'd just love it, and I'm really, _really_ good at it!  If I do say so myself!" Val pleaded loudly, picking himself up off the ground and crossing his legs to lean forward proudly.

Gaav thought a moment as the red hue deepened in his cheeks, meeting Val's glittering and expectant, rather fanatical looking, lustful eyes for only a moment, nearly caving to his own desires before snarling loudly and turning away.

"No!  And that's final!  Val, that's just not something one man does to...  You know...  Another man!" Gaav muttered, grimacing painfully, putting the mere thought of such a grievous act out of his mind.

"Huh?  What's so wrong with it?" Val queried innocently, biting a finger thoughtfully and tantalizingly, "I've done it lots of times!"

"Well I don't care, I don't want you to do it to me…" Gaav snapped shortly, crossing his arms over his chest and trying desperately to ignore the nagging, playful, positively arousing tugging on the sash of his trench coat.

"Please?  At least let me play with it for a little while!" Val continued, wrapping the battered suede strips tauntingly in his fingers and lowering his eyes.

"Now that's even worse!" roared Gaav, eyes widening, and smacking Val's hands roughly away, "Why don't you go play with your own?"

"Awww, that's not any fun at all!" lamented Val deafeningly as he rubbed his throbbing hands, "Playing with mine isn't satisfying, and yours is so much nicer!  It'll only take a little while out of your time and it feels so good!"

Gaav huffed and tightened his arms, gritting his teeth as a lower eyelid twitched and he clenched his fists in a very futile effort not to send Val flying in a hail of fireballs charred and smoking through the closed bedroom door.

"Uh huh, yeah, I'm so sure…" he growled under his breath.

"Come on, I can do it fast then!  It won't be quite as good as if I really take my time, but you can take it out right after and no one will ever know!" Val added hopefully, adoring smile still playing on his lips.

"_I_ would know!  _We_ would know!  How about that?  Besides, I don't like anyone but me fiddling with it…" Gaav retorted, closing his eyes presumptuously and sticking his nose in the air.

"But you keep it so cooped up all day!" the former ancient whined, brow furrowing, "It's so much more beautiful when it's not clamped in that tiny little-"

"Okay point taken!" Gaav growled, interrupting Val before he had a chance to finish, "I'm still not letting you touch it!  And that is all I'm saying on the matter!"

Val stuck out his lower lip disappointedly and crossed his arms bitterly as Gaav finally turned his attention fully back on him, glaring directly into his eyes and pointing an accusing finger into his naked chest to make his point.

"Get it?" he quipped furiously.

"Now you're just being unreasonable Gaav-sama!" Val importuned the instant the words left Gaav's lips, "Something so long, and thick, and gorgeous should be shared!  I'd be happy for the rest of my life if you just let me touch it I'm so desperate!  I bet no one's ever done what I want to do with it before, have they?"

Gaav's reddened cheeks deepened several shades as Val's impassioned voice rang clear in his ears and caused his vision to cloud with white, obscuring the smug smirk on Val's lips as the Demon Dragon cleared his throat loudly.

"Um, well no, I can't say that I've let anyone do…  _That_…  So why do you need to start?" he groused roughly.

"Because!  I want to!" Val chimed brightly, "It needs me…  I want to feel it, stroke it, run my hands over it and get a good set of teeth to it!"

Breath was suddenly a distinct impossibility for Gaav, whose jaw dropped and voice and all other articulating functions were cut off abruptly, only worsened by the delighted aura seeping from his smitten servant perched delicately before him on the ground.

"_Teeth_?  You said nothing about anything like _that_!" Gaav sibilated in horror, to which Val chortled practically and bared his fangs.

"You didn't think you'd get away without me using a brush did you?" he asked, producing a, broad, flat brush with black bristles that gleamed menacingly in the sunlight, "Come on, afraid of a few comb and brush teeth?  Just let me do it!"

Gaav backed a few more steps away, raising a hand over his face and warding off Val who crept slowly to his feet and skulked stealthily toward him, brush in hand and removing the rubber bands from his wrist deviously.

"No way!  No way in hell I'm letting you braid my hair!" Gaav shrieked, tripping over a footstool and falling helplessly back onto the bed.

"It's too late for that Gaav-sama!" Val trilled triumphantly, brandishing his weapons, "Relinquish your hair!"

Gaav's scream of agony and terror echoed throughout the mansion of a hideout he occupied, and only a few servants heard the distant screech for help, or the demonic cackling that accompanied a soft, quite non-masculine and disturbingly familiar sobbing.

Owari!!

What did you THINK it was gonna be you sick sick personage you???

Reviews are muchly appreciated!!  ^_^


End file.
